I spent at least half of my life being fearful of others opionions. Even when I knew I was right, when I was angry at an obvious injustice, or when I knew I should speak up, I most often remained silent. Part of my fear came from years of desperately trying to earn the approval of those closest to me. I felt that if I was "good", quiet, and easy going, I would be loved. The other part came from wanting so badly to be accepted by my peers. I wanted to go with the flow, so to speak, I'm order to be part of the crowd. I didn't want to stand out or speak out in anyway that would cause me to be stigmatized of labeled. Sad right? The good thing is that I am no longer afraid.
Years of insatiable acquiescence made me so angry and wounded. I was a shell of a person and could not love others because I was so fearful of their judgement and I could not love myself because I was ashamed of who I had become. A serious incident later changed my life and stripped me of my silence (more about that another day). I found myself stronger an unable to keep quiet any longer. Thank God.
The point is, we aren't all born brave. It's far easier to keep quiet in the face of oppression and injustice because speaking out often makes you a target. I get it. I really do. I have just chosen to live my life being true to what I believe is right whether the people around me do or not. I can not stand by and witness the maltreatment of my fellow man and I will most certainly not be silent if I, myself am ever again a victim.
Someone has to rock the boat and trouble the water. Someone has to take the helm and steer in a new direction. If we are to move forward, change things, and go places never before explored, we have no choice but to make waves. I have never seen still waters carry anyone anywhere.
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